Evil Dead (2013)

Evil Dead (2013)
Directed by: Fede Alvarez
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 65%

I went and saw the Evil Dead remake/reboot this evening and...*sigh* it was exactly what I thought it'd be. If you recall, I just recently saw the original Evil Dead so it was fresh in my mind as I sat through this modern retelling of the story. That being said, seeing the original in no way prepares you for what you are about to experience in the ninety-one minutes that follows.

Evil Dead is a modern teen horror movie set in an abandoned cabin in the woods. Our characters consist of: David (Shiloh Fernandez), his girlfriend Natalie (Elizabeth Blackmore), Eric (Lou Taylor Pucci), Olivia (Jessica Lucas), and David's sister, Mia (Jane Levy). It is revealed early in the film that David is estranged from his friends, and has come back to town to help them aid Mia in a cold turkey drug rehabilitation. David is the Ash analogue in this retelling but he shares no similarities with Bruce Campbell's cult classic character. He broods for much of the movie and is generally unlikeable. The rehab treatment appears to be going well until Eric finds the Necronomicon and lets his curiosity get the better of him. He recites some phrases in the book bound in flesh and releases The Evil.

Evil Dead has a few subtle hints to the original movie (the cabin is the same, there is a broken down Oldsmobile, Mia is wearing a Michigan State shirt, and the chainsaw makes an appearance) but other than little hints; this is a completely different version of the story. During the film my girlfriend said "I'm going to text you something that I want you to discuss in your review". That text said "10 things I learned from watching 'scary' movies". Something you need to understand about my girlfriend: she HATES to be scared. She panicked when I told her I wanted to see this movie but she went with me because she loves me. We laughed through the whole movie because it simply wasn't scary. The studio had a huge budget compared to the original ($17 million as opposed to the $400,000 budget of the original). Sure, the effects were better, the makeup was better, and the mood was creepier but the little things were lost. The camera work was too "professional" in this version. Part of what made the original film so scary is that the camera work felt amateur; like something you could personally do. This added to the realism. It's the same effect that The Blair Witch Project had. This is the list of things we learned by watching "scary" movies that Katie and I came up with:

1) While being chased, your sense of balance will suddenly disappear.
2) Doors will ALWAYS slam when a character enters a dangerous room.
3) There will be yellow eyes looking at you at some point.
4) Lights will inevitably flicker or go out at some point.
5) It's never the first key you try.
6) The weapons lying around will be used by the villan first.
7) The bad guy/girl/thing isn't dead yet!
8) Everything is over the top to increase intensity (i.e. blood showers instead of drops and foul language).
9) That thing that has all the warnings about how bad it is? Yeah, listen to those warnings
10) You're NEVER safe!

No BS

The Evil Dead reboot is worth seeing if you're a fan of the franchise. You will get to see the nods and will have fun tearing it apart as you watch. It would be on par with a Hate Watch. If you don't like horror movies then it's probably not for you but as I stated above, we laughed through the whole thing. Plus there is a scene that all I could think of was this:


My Score: 6/10